Hello,

My names Sacha (I'm logging in on my Mum's old account) and would greatly appreciate some help.

I’ve recently moved to a new area and the dog walking ‘etiquette’ is completely different from what I and therefore my dog are used to...

Where I used to live, if you were walking in a known dog walking area and you saw someone with their dog off the lead and they made no attempt to put their dog on the lead or frantically called for their dog, it was always assumed they were friendly and your dogs could happily greet each other.

Now, where I’ve moved to is completely different and people are really funny about your dog greeting theirs. I could understand if their dog was on the lead and they complained but I always put my dog on the lead if another dog is and he is used to this routine.

However, with him being brought up being used to greeting other dogs off the lead, he trots up to say hello first and then comes back when I call. It’s what he’s always been used to and this is the habit I need to break as I’m sick of the nasty, snarky comments I’ve been getting from some people in the area.

He’s 6 years old so it’s well ingrained in him but any advice would be great as it’s really getting me down if we encounter someone who isn't as friendly as their dog! I’ve been resorting to putting him on the lead when I see any dog just in case someone makes a comment but then people just assume he's not friendly (which couldn't be further from the truth).

I just don’t understand the mentality of not letting dogs greet each other as it’s good for socialisation.

Thank you

That's a difficult one, training dogs is easy compared with training owners. What on earth are they worried about? My experience is the same as yours, a dog off the lead is assumed to be friendly (unless it's a gundog which in our area usually means it's been trained to be abject and miserable). I don't know what to suggest, unless you can get talking to a friendly owner and ask them how they deal with it. Your poor boy must be very confused.

How miserable

I know dogs like my Beamish (young, big and bouncy) are intimidating to other smaller dogs so I always put him on his lead when I see a dog approaching, but my other two are always happy to meet and greet nicely. I can't see why people with dogs wouldn't like that.

Tbh I think my approach would be to get in first with something bright and breezy such as "Oh! I'm sorry, I assumed that your dog was friendly as it's off lead!" and then ask questions such as "Doesn't he like other dogs?".

Unless there are restrictions and by-laws to say otherwise, and if your dog is friendly and greets dogs calmly I don't see why he should go on lead when others are off lead. If you don't want to bump into other dogs, you don't go regularly to places where people walk their dogs do you If he was running up to people rather than dogs then perhaps it would be different

I think what has been so intimidating about the whole experience is that it's been men that have been having a go at me. I'm only early twenties so to have a grown man rip into you over a friendly dog greeting their also friendly dog is really upsetting.

I understand that he's a big, black hound but he doesn't jump up and usually just trots up, has a sniff and a quick wag of his tail and he comes back to me or I've caught up with the other owner by then and we either have a chat (if they're friendly people) or walk on with a quick smile and hello.

I've been reading on other dog training forums and the general consensus is that I'm completely in the wrong for letting him approach other dogs regardless of whether they're off the lead or not - So I'll have to adjust this behavior. It's going to be a massive change for Jasper as people usually make loads of fuss over him so him greeting other dogs is very rewarding for him usually.

Wow that is so weird , As we've always taken the rule as, if their dog is off, keep your dog off, everyone's friendly. If theirs is on, put yours on.

I agree with Bid, ask questions as to why they are disapproving of you if theirs is off lead.

it sounds like you have good control over him so I would suggest when you see a dog off lead, shout "is he friendly? can they meet & great?" If the answer is No put him on a lead as you go past, if it's Yes then there's no problem . This might help. It sounds like you've met some unfriendly dog owners.

Oh & Welcome to the forum from us, we're all very friendly.

No training advice but think u've been incredibly unlucky bumping into such bullies and bullies is what these 'men' are, ripping into a very young woman like that, it's disgusting. Do u think as time goes on and people get to know Jasper that things will calm down. Could u take Jasper on a different route as I'll be honest with u, I don't like the sound of those men at all. Maybe try a different route and hopefully u will meet nicer owners and they will get to know that Jasper means no harm. Sorry u have had to put up with this horrible behaviour from 'men'. There are ways and means of getting messages across without ripping into young women xx

How horrible! I've bumped into a couple dog owners in our area who let their dogs off in the dog parks, even though they know their dog to be aggressive! There's this little jack russell and the owner ALWAYS has him off lead, but he has attacked other dogs! In dog parks you would definitely expect some sort of socialisation between dogs to be ok, but I've had to take to keeping Wispa on lead until I can make sure the other dog and owner are ok with her saying hello and playing. As she's a puppy I've found that a lot of owners are happy that I keep her on lead and ask if their dogs mind a puppy trying to play with them. I've never had an owner except the jack russell's say no, though.

When we're in the woods Wispa always runs up to sniff other off-lead dogs, but we always go on-lead when they are. I don't understand the owners in your area.. unless they've had lots of aggressive dogs around in the past and are wary of any dogs running up to theirs..

From my perspective you've done nothing wrong. I'm sure there will be people who disagree with me, but if you let your dog off the lead you should expect other dogs and people to interact with it. Indeed letting a dog off it's lead to me indicates that it is trusted by the owner to behave around other people and dogs. I would be more wary of a dog if it remained leashed, and would only approach it at a nod from the owner, same goes for what I would allow my dog to do. I would generally expect puppies to be leashed as they tend to be a little too entheusiastic! Dogs are sociable animals and greeting another dog it encounters while on a walk is simply part of canine psyche. Dogs read each others body language quickly and will usually avoid or approach other dogs as appropriate (there are of course the big dumbos who approach any old dog nevermind the signs given by the other, and they should be under control of the owner!)

Hi Carole,

I wonder exactly how many of these bullies you've met? Is it loads of different men, or just the same few? You've mentioned these nasty men, but are there other dog owners who are happy for your dog to greet theirs? It can't be EVERY dog owner you meet, can it?

What I'm getting at is I don't think you ARE in the wrong. What everyone here says is right, if a dog is on the lead there's a reason for it, so steer clear until you know the score. I don't let Phoebe play with a dog that's on the lead, even if it is friendly, because it's just not fair to the other dog.

But, if the dog is off lead it has to be assume that's it's friendly. Dogs will naturally greet each other, and let's be honest, it's part of the joy of being a dog owner that, through our dogs, we get chatting and friendly with other dog owners.

I think you need to get to the bottom of this as it's obviously upsetting you. Can you possibly nicely ask why they're objecting to your dog politely saying hello to theirs?

I hope you sort it out.

GOSH how awful for you - that is really upsetting i hate it when people have a go at me because i have a friendly happy dog !!!! luckily so far its only happened a couple of times to me. most people where i live, love dogs.

i would go with the above advice and would only put my dog on the lead if the other dog was. If someone has a go at you again i would politely tell them to stop being so grumpy and if they dont like friendly dogs they should perhpas get a fish as a pet instead !

ive decided that if people cant be friendly to me then i wont hesitate in sticking up for myself - there's some bloody ignorant around.

get back to enjoying your happy lovely dog

I think this could the problem! I have a big black doodle too, and it's surprising how many people are scared of him! A lot of men will get all narky if they feel intimidated by a dog, just so they don't lose face. Admittedly mine is young and boisterous which is why he goes on lead if I don't know someone, but if I don't see them coming and he goes to greet them I can see that it could look alarming, even though he is a big softie.

Why not come along to one of the many Northern Doodles meets and then at least we are all in it together.
Most place we go have some element of off lead walking so we can all let the dogs socialise.

anything from 5 or 6 to 50 dogs.

From the other side I can let both of mine off without them running up to dog they don't know and I guess it would be nice if people showed the same respect. If there dog is running to yours and they meet in the middle - fair enough, but just coz they don'thave a lead on doesn't mean that they ain't under control.

I know I am going against the grain here but when a loose dog comes running up to my two (if I don't really know the dog) how do I know that its friendly...lovable...etc??

I would say call your dog back and simply ask "is it okay?" and don't be offended if they say no.

A lot of guys who have gundogs or working dogs will walk them off lead but will not want their dogs to go off having a good time ( SAD I KNOW) and these will normally be the gobby ones or so I've found.

Anyway good luck, it would be great to see you on a North East Meet - assuming that you still live up this way